ELI RATES THE GAMES
By KCOW Weekend Warrior and Resident Madman Eli Smith

This has been a pretty impressive year for gaming, with Halo 4, Assassin’s Creed 3, Dishonored, and many more. But with all of these amazing games coming out, it can be easy to overlook output from some of the lesser developers.

Today, that lesser known developer is 505 studios, and the game of choice is Naughty Bear – Panic in Paradise. In this game you play as an adorable, stuffed teddy bear who has a bit of a mean streak. The other bears who are now located on Paradise Island do not like you for one reason or another, and that has caused the teddy bear you control (Naughty Bear) to snap. So, in order to get even with the bears who shunned him, he decides to go on a massive and murderous rampage. Obviously, this game’s storyline isn’t meant to be taken seriously.

The gameplay encourages a bit of creativity in the way you dish out your revenge. You can use a number of different objects in the world– including weapons you can hold in your hand, or larger objects that can be shoved into the other bears.  For example, you could choose between killing a bear with a garden rake, or shoving a bear into the fridge. There are many different options. There is even a level of “insanity” with each bear; when other bears see you murdering a bear, it can cause their insanity to rise. Once their “insanity” reaches a certain level, you can push them over the edge and cause them to kill themselves–usually by exploding or beating themselves to death. It’s all rather disturbing, but do not forget that these are only teddy bears. (Nevertheless, the amount of violence might be something to keep in mind if you’re considering buying this game for a child.)  Other gameplay options include the ability to hide in the bushes and wear disguises; however, despite all these options, “Naughty Bear” is pretty repetitive. Each level is a variation on what’s essentially the same thing, scaring and killing bears. Eventually the gameplay becomes dry and somewhat boring, meaning that this game needs to be taken slowly. That being said, there are a number of unlockables available, giving completionists and perfectionists much to do.

The graphics are nothing special; the worlds are mildly interesting, but when you go through it multiple times you find that there is nothing to look at. The game often re-uses areas, and the worlds are rather small and boring.  However, I’m willing to forgive this, as it is a $20 game, and we cannot expect too much detail in a title like this.

The sound is actually an interesting element in this game. When people are within earshot of a trapped or hurt bear, they come to the rescue. You also have the ability to make a “boo” sound effect that can be used to attract or scare enemies. The sounds that these bears make are adorable, and rather funny given the game.

The music isn’t too interesting; it’s happy and joyful when Naughty Bear is not focused on, and twisted and scary during periods where he is focused on. During actual gameplay, background music only appears during scary moments, such as when Naughty Bear makes a kill.

To conclude, this game is a little stale and boring, and would not be worth the $60 price point assigned to major titles. But for $20 this game is well worth playing. It is silly and rather goofy–and despite the fact that driving bears insane and murdering them seems rather horrific, remember that they’re only stuffed animals. However, as I previously mentioned, there are some mature themes behind  this game, and I wouldn’t recommend it for incredibly young children.